If you are contemplating filing for bankruptcy and divorce in Tulsa, Oklahoma, it is probably a very stressful time for you and your spouse. Finances are seriously affected in both instances — divorce is actually one of the top reasons couples file for bankruptcy.

The following tips will help minimize the negative impacts of both bankruptcy and divorce. While this time in your life may be overwhelming, it does not have to be unbearable.

Don’t File for Bankruptcy and Divorce at the Same Time

This is a common issue that happens quite frequently. Most bankruptcy and divorce attorneys will encourage you and your spouse to file for bankruptcy first. If you file for bankruptcy first, the court will put a stay on your assets and debts, making the divorce impossible to complete.

While a stay is in place, assets and debts cannot be divided in a divorce action. Filing at the same time means your divorce will take longer, become more stressful, and can cost more to complete.

If You Have a High Conflict Divorce

For some couples, it is not possible to file for bankruptcy first. If you and your spouse are on good terms, then bankruptcy is the ideal first filing. However, if you have a possible high-conflict divorce or you and your spouse don’t meet the income requirement for a bankruptcy, then divorce might be better for you to file for first.

The benefits to filing bankruptcy first include:

• Sharing of attorney fees
• No joint liability on debt payments
• Double exemptions on assets
• Simplified divorce later down the road because most assets and debts are divided during bankruptcy

If you and your spouse do not get along but realize the benefits of filing bankruptcy first, it may convince you to work together toward an easier common goal.

A Quick Divorce Process – Chapter 7

If you and your spouse are agreeable and want to complete the bankruptcy process before the divorce, then Chapter 7 bankruptcy is the best option. Chapter 7 bankruptcy is able to erase all debt in a matter of three to six months, and you will be able to file for divorce sooner.

In a Chapter 12 bankruptcy, the debt payoff process can take three to five years. Although you can divorce during a Chapter 12 bankruptcy, you must either restructure or cancel the repayment plan after the divorce is final. If you choose to cancel the repayment plan, all debt is reassigned to you and your spouse, not an ideal situation.

Chapter 12 bankruptcy also does not discharge all debt. The following is not eligible to be discharged in a chapter 12 bankruptcy:

• Alimony
• Child support
• Debts to government agencies
• Student Loans
• Court Fines
• Attorney Fees

In addition, a debt cannot be discharged if:

• The application fails to include required tax documents.
• You hide property for purpose of defrauding.
• You destroy financial records.
• Commit perjury in your case.
• Violate a court order.
• You do not complete a credit counseling class.

Multiple Attorneys

Lastly, if you file for bankruptcy and divorce at the same time, you will likely have two attorneys with two separate legal fees. This can be overwhelming for finances and stress.  Securing a bankruptcy attorney first will allow you to save on your divorce attorney because a lot of the work and division of assets and debts already will be completed.

Initial Consultation with a Tulsa Divorce Attorney

Consult an attorney as soon as possible if you are thinking of filing for bankruptcy and divorce in order to better understand your rights and options. An attorney can help advocate on your behalf and advise you on your best options.

Hiring a knowledgeable and compassionate family law attorney will ensure the process is expertly conducted and your interests are well represented.

Contact an experienced Tulsa family law attorney when you need to go through the Oklahoma divorce process.

For a low-cost confidential consultation, call now: (918) 924-5526.

Most divorce attorneys will encourage parties to cooperate with each other and learn to compromise when going through a divorce in efforts to avoid a contested divorce in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Many times this is not easy to do due to lingering relationship issues, incompatible personalities, and anger about the situation.

It is important to understand the difference between a contested divorce and an uncontested — or default divorce — because there are benefits to an uncontested divorce that can make the process easier.

Agreement

In a contested divorce, the parties cannot agree on getting a divorce or agree to decisions related to the divorce such as custody, division of assets, or alimony.

On the other hand, an uncontested divorce means both spouses agree on all the decisions that must be made for a divorce.

Agreement greatly affects all elements of a divorce, which we will touch on below. The basic premise of agreement is the understanding between both spouses that they must cooperate, remain respectful, not let their emotions get the better of them, and compromise.

Time

As mentioned before, agreement affects all aspects of a divorce process, especially time. When a divorce is contested, it means it will take more time in the courtroom, more time with attorneys, and more time spent worrying about your case.

In an uncontested divorce — because the spouses both agree on the important decisions of their divorce case — their divorce may only take a few meetings with their attorneys to complete the final divorce paperwork. There is less time in the courtroom fighting over assets or custody, less time meeting with attorneys, and less time worrying about the outcome.

Emotional Toll

It doesn’t take a divorce attorney to tell you that parties in a contested divorce have a high amount of stress, sleep less, and worry more. There are so many uncertainties when it comes to a contested divorce because most of the decisions are up to a judge, not you and your spouse. There is less control and more hearings to sit through, as well, in a contested divorce.

In an uncontested divorce, while the emotions may still be high, they are not amplified by the stress a contested divorce produces.  Working cooperatively creates a feeling of trust and respect, which lowers the feelings of anger and worry.

Many times couples report they “feel nothing” when they go through the uncontested divorce process. While not ideal, they typically seek out family, friends or a therapist to process feelings — or lack of feelings — in a healthy way.

Courtroom

It is true that if you and your spouse agree on everything, you will never have to see the inside of a courtroom. A courtroom and judge are used for when parties cannot come to an agreement and need the judge to decide an issue in their divorce case.

In an uncontested divorce, you and your spouse will sign a marital settlement agreement, or an MSA, when you have agreed upon all the important elements of your divorce case. These elements include child custody, child support, visitation, relocation, division of assets and debts, separate property, and alimony.

Initial Consultation with a Tulsa Divorce Attorney

Consulting with an attorney as soon as possible in a divorce case is very important in order to preserve your rights and make sure terms of your divorce settlement are fair.  An attorney can help you remain cooperative and reasonable during the entire divorce process.

Hopefully you and your spouse will be able to pursue an uncontested divorce in order to save on time, emotional stress, and visits to the courtroom. Hiring a knowledgeable and compassionate family law attorney will ensure the process is expertly conducted and your interests are well represented.

Contact an experienced Tulsa family law attorney when you need to go through the Oklahoma divorce process.

For a low-cost confidential consultation, call now: (918) 924-5526.

Your divorce process will affect every fiber of your life, it will impact your family and can have lasting effects as well, whether it is a mediated or litigated divorce in Oklahoma. How you choose to pursue your divorce action will dictate how it will negatively or positively impact you.

In a litigated divorce, each spouse is represented in the courtroom by a separate attorney. Each divorce attorney will advocate on behalf of their client and present the case to a family court judge. The judge will ultimately make the final decisions in your divorce case.

In a mediated case, a neutral third party — known as the mediator — helps to facilitate communication between the parties in the case. Mediated divorces do not have to go to court because the parties, mediator and divorce attorneys work together to reach agreements in the case.  The mediator’s job is to encourage helpful discussions, explain the law and provide options.

Cost

The first major difference between a litigated divorce and a mediated divorce is the cost of the divorce.  In a mediated divorce, many mediators offer a fixed amount for mediation services.  However, many divorce attorneys are certified mediators and charge by the hourly fee.

Most mediation costs include court costs, filing fees, paperwork and communication in their hourly fee or flat rate fee. Most retainers for litigated cases start between $5,000 and $15,000 just to get the paperwork started. Both you and your spouse will each be paying an attorney, who will work long hours prepping for hearings and trial, costing much higher than a typical mediated divorce.

Time

In mediation, it usually only takes a few meetings with the mediator to complete the divorce process and create the marital settlement agreement. You spend less time in mediation because cooperation makes decisions occur faster, process of service is easier, and most of the work to get your divorce started takes place in the first meeting.

In a litigated divorce, it can take years to complete. If you and your spouse disagree on most issues in your divorce, then every issue will need a hearing date. In order to be assigned a hearing date, your divorce attorney will need to submit a request for hearing form. Once submitted, you will be assigned a court date, sometimes six to eight weeks in the future.

If there is an issue with the court date, your attorney may end up continuing the hearing to an even further date in the future. Not to mention, if your spouse is holding up the process, it will take that much more time.

Control Over Result

There are rare moments where you are actually in control of the way your court case will end. In a mediated divorce, however, you and your spouse get the power to make all decisions pertaining to your case. These decisions are then memorialized in a marital settlement agreement. The marital settlement agreement is not appealable, thus you are officially done with your divorce when you sign it.

In a litigated divorce, the judge will make all the decisions that you and your spouse cannot agree on.  There will be times where you think the judge is ruling unfairly, and times where you will like the decision. There is little to no control of the outcome of your case in this situation.

When Litigated Divorce is Necessary

A marital settlement agreement in Oklahoma is a preferred way to conclude a divorce because it allows both spouses to have a say in the final outcome of the case. It also tends to take less time and be less expensive.

However, some spouses feel like they did not get a fair share of assets or the visitation agreement that they wanted. Because a marital settlement agreement is not appealable, it is important that you feel satisfied with the final terms of the agreement.

The main elements in a marital settlement agreement include child custody, child support and expenses, alimony, and division of assets and debts. We provide issues to consider and how to reach a fair agreement with your spouse.

 

Child Custody

Both you and your spouse will go from full-time parents to part-time. It is going to be very difficult for both of you to adjust to and learn to live with. Remember, you want to have your children just as much as your spouse does, but it is important that both parents have a relationship with their children. It’s hard to weigh the desire to have your children all the time and the desire for them to have a relationship with the other parent.

Because there are few laws on this matter, custody will be determined by you and your spouse, with help from both of your attorneys. When making this determination in your marital settlement agreement, do what’s best for your children, try to set your feelings aside, and do not react in anger.

 

Child Support and Expenses

If you and your spouse cannot come to an agreement on child support in your marital settlement agreement, the court will order child support for you using state guidelines. Remember, child support is for the benefit of your child — if you withhold support from your spouse, you are withholding it from your children.

Think about the kinds of toys, vacations and activities they had when you and your spouse were still together. By trying to maintain what your children had during the marriage, you have a starting point on what support will look like. Maintaining that continuity will help your children adjust and cope with the divorce as well. Memorializing this agreement in your marital settlement agreement is important so the expectations and guidelines are well outlined.

 

Alimony

Alimony is a difficult amount to determine for most divorce attorneys and family court judges. Many of the guideline amounts tend to be arbitrary and end up not serving the purpose of alimony. Both of you should review your resources, needs and abilities. These will help your divorce attorney better understand what financial needs each spouse requires in the marital settlement agreement.

Your divorce attorney will prepare documents that are referred to as financial disclosures. Your divorce attorney will provide these to your spouse and their attorney. Your spouse’s attorney will also provide these disclosures to your divorce attorney. This allows both of you to see each other’s list of specific assets and debts. Knowing specific assets and debts is crucial in determining who receives alimony and an approximate amount that is agreeable by both spouses.

 

Division of Debts and Assets

Dividing possessions in your marital settlement agreement, especially those that both spouses have lived with for a long time, can be difficult. What was once both of yours will become the property of just one spouse. There are going to be items that both you and your spouse would like, and this is where your divorce attorney will help the most.

It may seem like the silver collection or fine art pieces are worth going to court for to make sure the items are distributed to you.  However, the time, money and unpredictability of family law judges are major reasons why creating a marital settlement agreement of your division of assets and debts is important.

When you take the decision of dividing assets away from you and your spouse, you place yourself and your assets in an unpredictable position. Although the law may be on your side, family law judges in Oklahoma are only required to divide assets and debts in a “fair and equitable” way, not an equal division. Working with your divorce attorney and your spouse’s will ensure both of you are content with your decisions in your marital settlement agreement.

It is important to remember that you will have to give up some items in order to receive items that are higher on your list. Consider your priorities before disagreeing or threatening to go to court over a specific item. You may need to call experts in to identify values, provide appraisals, or to assist in re-financing.

 

Initial Consultation with a Tulsa Divorce Attorney

Following the above tips will lead to a more peaceful and productive marital settlement agreement process. Consulting with an attorney as soon as possible in a divorce case is very important in order to preserve your rights and make sure terms of your marital settlement agreement is fair.

An attorney can help you remain cooperative and reasonable during the entire divorce process. A divorce attorney also can act as your advocate in the case of a difficult opposing spouse.

Hiring a knowledgeable and compassionate family law attorney will ensure the process is expertly conducted and your interests are well represented in your marital settlement agreement.

Contact an experienced Tulsa family law attorney when you need to go through the Oklahoma divorce process.

For a low-cost confidential consultation, call now: (918) 924-5526.

For many, the idea of your first family law attorney meeting in Tulsa can be overwhelming — and a little intimidating.

If you are going through a divorce or child custody action, you probably know very little of the procedures involved. In contrast, divorces and child custody cases are what your soon-to-be family law attorney works on every day and went to years of schooling to perfect.

However, your family law attorney is there to help you and be your advocate. Feeling stressed and overwhelmed is natural, but not necessary. Every step of the way, your family law attorney will guide you.

Here are some ways to start your relationship and be prepared for the first family law attorney meeting.

Maximize Your First Family Law Attorney Meeting

You want to use every minute of your first family law attorney meeting discussing relevant issues in your case. It is very helpful to bring documents with you, but it is not required. Bringing the documents mentioned below helps your attorney give the best, well-informed advice in the first family law attorney meeting.

In addition, having these documents ready will save on time your attorney may spend on trying to track down you or the documents in order to more forward on your case. This ends up saving you time billed because you have already done all the heavy lifting!

Write down all your specific questions ahead of time, and bring a notebook. There is a lot of information that you will cover in your first family law attorney meeting. Writing everything down will help recall and save your money so you don’t have to keep calling your family law attorney with questions.

Summary of Family History

One of the first documents to hand to your attorney during the first family law attorney meeting is a summary of your family history. Make a copy for yourself so that you can reference this when going over it with your family law attorney.

The family summary should include when you and your spouse where married and where you were married, the names of your children and their birth dates, your education and employment history — as well as your spouse’s — and any special needs you, your spouse or your children have.

Assets and Debts

This is a really important category because this is a large piece of the divorce process. Assets and debts are divided using equitable distribution — The only way to divide the assets and debts is to have an accurate understanding of what they are currently.

Unfortunately, it is not uncommon for spouses to start hiding assets or valuables when a divorce proceeding begins, so having a comprehensive list is very important.  If you can, take pictures of the most valuable assets in case you are concerned your divorce may become high-conflict.

Here are some examples of what to include in your asset and debt list:

• Any and all real estate you own
• Cars, jewelry, valuable art, furniture, any collections
• Bank Accounts
• Financial Investment Accounts
• Pensions, retirement
• If you own a family business: financial statements for last three years
• If you have a Trust, any documents pertaining to it
• Debts: mortgage, credit cards, loans

When making this list for your first family law attorney meeting, make sure to include the dates when the asset or debt begun. For example, the date you purchased your family home, when your retirement started to accrue, etc.

Additional Documents

There are three more miscellaneous documents that you should bring with you to your first family law attorney meeting.  First, bring any documentation or list of any valuable gifts that you received or any inheritance you have been given.

Second, bring with you your proof of income. This can be pay stubs or tax returns. Most clients bring two years of tax returns and their pay stubs if they are currently working.

Last, make a breakdown of current expenses for your children. This includes activities like sports teams, piano or music lessons, school activities, and any additional medical or dental costs that aren’t covered by insurance. This will help your family law attorney get a better idea of you and your spouses total financial status.

Initial Consultation with a Tulsa Child Support Attorney

Your first family law attorney meeting can be emotionally exhausting — you are discussing topics that you probably would never discuss with your best friend. A skilled family law attorney will ensure a smooth process and minimal stress for everyone.

Hiring a knowledgeable and compassionate family law attorney will ensure the process is expertly conducted and your interests are well represented.

Contact an experienced Tulsa family law attorney when you need to go through the Oklahoma relocation process.

For a low-cost confidential consultation, call now at (918) 924-5526.