Child Custody

Although divorce is difficult, not having access to your children is even harder for most parents.

An increasingly common issue people hear is, “my spouse left Oklahoma with my child.”

If your spouse has left the state with your children, he or she may be in violation of Oklahoma law and you may be able to file a police report.

However, you also have civil remedies available in a Tulsa family court.

My Spouse Left Oklahoma With My Child – What Can I Do?

As a preliminary matter, both spouses have joint physical and legal custody of their children. However, it is illegal for one spouse to hide or conceal their children.

Oklahoma law states that it is a crime to maliciously forcibly or fraudulently conceal a child from anyone who has custodial rights.  (21 O.S. § 891; see Wilkins v. State, 985 P.2d 184 (Ct of Crim App 1999).

Therefore, taking children out of state without the permission or knowledge of the other parent is a crime.

Civil Liability in Tulsa Child Custody Matters

Although the other parent can be arrested for taking a child out of state in these circumstances, you will also need a civil court order to get them back.

You can file an emergency custody order, which will require the other parent to return the child.

If he or she fails to bring the children back, he will be in contempt of the order and will face additional civil penalties.

An emergency custody order will likely give you primary physical custody of the children and will be in place at least until the divorce is finalized.

FAQ: The Oklahoma Divorce Process

In order to get a divorce, the spouse must have been a resident of Oklahoma within the past six months.

Therefore, you should file for divorce as soon as possible if the other spouse intends to live outside of the state indefinitely. To file in Tulsa, you must have been a resident for 30 days.

During the divorce, you should ask that the other parent not take the children out of state without permission as part of the final divorce decree.

Initial Consultation with a Tulsa Divorce Lawyer

When your marriage comes to an end, you will need the best legal representation. Contact a reliable and knowledgeable Tulsa divorce attorney today.

A no-cost initial consultation can help you decide whether Divorce of Tulsa Law Office can provide the best Tulsa child custody lawyer for your family law matter.

For a low-cost confidential consultation, call now: 918-924-5526.

After you’ve broken up with the mother or father of your children, the biggest issue between the two of you will likely pertain to following child visitation guidelines in Oklahoma.

Even if a Tulsa family court has ordered visitation at designated times, most parents occasionally deviate from this plan.

If this happens routinely, you have several options available to you under child visitation guidelines in Oklahoma.

Speak with Your Ex

Courts are not inclined to grant relief based upon one or two minor violations of a visitation agreement.

Therefore, if your ex has not egregiously violated the order, such as not returning the children, you should simply reach out and speak with them.

Consider the following common scenarios where speaking with your ex may be reasonable.

1. Returning the children late.

Consider a scenario where your ex took the children to an amusement park for the day, but returned them at 9pm instead of 6pm, as ordered by the court.

Here, you should contact them by e-mail or text message (to document the incident), calmly remind them of the agreed upon visitation time, and ask that they communicate beforehand if they think they will be late.

2. Not exercising visitation.

If your ex has not exercised visitation at all, send an e-mail or text message. Here, you can remind them of the agreement, and ask that they communicate with you each and every time they will be unable to spend time with the children as agreed upon.

However, if your ex has failed to exercise visitation in several weeks, it may be time to go back to court.

3. Wanting visitation on days not ordered by the court.

Sometimes, your ex may want extra visitation time or try to make up days they voluntarily missed by wanting the children on alternative days (i.e. she missed visitation on Monday, so now wants the kids on Tuesday.)

Although you can certainly agree to this if you want, you are not required to allow visitation on any days not ordered by the court. Therefore, if you do not want to allow alternative visitation, tell your ex that you prefer to stick with the court order to avoid confusion down the road.

4. Not allowing visitation.

If your ex has, for any reason, denied you visitation, they are in violation of child visitation guidelines in Oklahoma. In this situation, send an e-mail or text message to your ex stating that you were prepared to visit with your children on the day and time ordered by the court.

Remind them that the visitation agreement requires visitation on that day, and that you will be prepared to see the children at the next ordered date.

If they respond, ask if you can make up the time. If they do not respond, you may need to file a contempt motion if it happens more than two or three times.

In this scenario, it is very important that you document through personal notes, e-mail or text messages that your ex has not allowed you to visit with the children in accordance with the order.

Contempt of Child Visitation Guidelines in Oklahoma

A contempt motion is available to litigants who have already received a court order. If your ex has repeatedly violated the court’s order with respect to visitation, you can file a motion for contempt.

Although your own testimony is acceptable, you should bring evidence with you that your ex has, in fact, violated the court’s order. E-mails and text messages are usually sufficient.

When you file a contempt motion, your ex will have to come to court to explain why he or she has violated the court order. If the court finds that your ex is in contempt of the order, it may simply seek to redress the situation.

If, for example, your ex always returns the children late because she does not have her own transportation, the court may order that you pick the children up from a mutual agreeable location. Or, the court may adjust the visitation schedule to accommodate the transportation problem.

In other cases, the court may order extra visitation time if one parent has prevented the other from visiting with their children. Or, the court may amend the order altogether.

The court may also order that the parent pays a civil fine for violating the order if they repeatedly and seriously violate child visitation guidelines in Oklahoma. Although jail is a possibility for a parent who violates a contempt order, this is unlikely in most cases.

Initial Consultation with a Tulsa Divorce Lawyer

When the other parent is in violation of child visitation guidelines in Oklahoma, you may feel as though you have limited options.

However, an experienced Tulsa child custody lawyer can help get things back on track.

A no-cost initial consultation can help you decide whether the Divorce of Tulsa Law Office can provide the best Tulsa child custody lawyer for your family law matter. For a low-cost confidential consultation, call now: 918-924-5526.

After the issue of child custody is determined in Tulsa, parents must put an Oklahoma parenting plan into place.

A parenting plan is a tool used by the court to ensure that parents know how to proceed with issues of visitation.

Once you’ve entered into an Oklahoma parenting plan, the parties must abide by it and a judge can enforce it as necessary.

Why an Oklahoma Parenting Plan?

A parenting plan is meant to encourage parents to co-parent as effectively as possible, even when they are no longer in a relationship or even like each other.

Courts, in most cases, will require parents to share joint legal custody, which pertains to decision-making about education, religion, extracurricular activities, health, etc.

Only in cases of severe abuse or violence will a court typically award sole legal custody to one parent.

Therefore, an Oklahoma parenting plan will require parents to set forth who will make decisions. The answer is typically that both parents will share this responsibility.

Regular Visits

The primary purpose of an Oklahoma parenting plan is to determine when the non-custodial parent will visit with the children.

In instances where a child is in infancy or has a developmental problem, the court may allow the noncustodial parent to enter into a graduated visitation schedule, which allows for more parenting time as the child gets older.

Usually, though, a noncustodial parent will visit with his or her children every other weekend or every weekend. They may also get visitation time during the week, as well.

It is important to note that the custodial parent can never withhold visitation during an agreed upon time, unless there is an actual danger to the children.

Holidays

The custodial parent and noncustodial parent must also agree on holidays. Mothers usually choose to retain visitation on Mother’s Day and fathers usually get Father’s Day.

For the remainder of the holidays, parents alternate. While one parent gets MLK Day, another may get Presidents Day, for example.

Or, the noncustodial parent may want to ask for all three-day weekends.

As for Christmas and Thanksgiving, many parents alternate Thanksgiving and Christmas. One year, the dad will have Thanksgiving and the next year the mom will spend Thanksgiving with the children. The same applies to Christmas.

However, school-aged children will often have a “Winter Break,” which parents will split as well.

Summers

Many noncustodial parents will want to spend all or some of the summer with their children for extended periods of time.

As long as there are no safety concerns, a court will grant at least one to two whole weeks to the noncustodial parent. However, a noncustodial parent can always ask for much more than that (i.e. a whole month or the whole summer.)

Medical and Educational Occurrences

The Oklahoma parenting plan also outlines what to do in the event that a medical or educational decision has to be made.

For example, the parenting plan will outline what to do and who to contact if the child becomes sick. It will also outline what to do if something happens at school and a parent needs to be contacted.

Emergency Occurrences

What to do when an emergency occurs will also be determined in your Oklahoma parenting plan. This includes who to contact and where to take the children.

Oklahoma Parenting Plan Tips

Make it practical-

Remember, this is not just a piece of paper. It is how you will actually live your life. When making a child visitation schedule, think “Is this practical? Will this work logistically?”

For example, a lot of people travel over Christmas holidays. It would not be practical to agree that the dad has visitation every Christmas Day starting at noon. It would be very difficult for the mom to make travel plans that include spending Christmas away, if she must return the child to the dad at this specific day and time.

You will also want to consider your child’s schedule when drafting an Oklahoma parenting plan. If your daughter plays soccer every weekend, but you’ve planned for her to spend every other weekend with her dad who lives out of town, this arrangement may not work. Always think through every scenario and come up with a parenting plan that truly represents your family’s needs.

Don’t over-complicate it- Many people are tempted to draft a parenting plan that is too detailed or specific, which does not yield to life’s changes. Keep it as simple as possible.

Consider: “The dad shall have parenting time every third weekend, except when Katy has piano or soccer, beginning at 1pm every Saturday. If Katy has piano, the dad can have the fourth Saturday. If Katy has soccer, her dad can have Thursdays.” This is simply too complicated for all parties involved.

A simpler plan to address Katy’s piano and soccer engagements is, “Her dad shall have visitation every third weekend and shall be responsible for transporting and attending any extracurricular activities that may arise.”

Concede– Sometimes parents become too caught up in the minutia and refuse to give in on small matters. Remember that conceding on small things helps move your family toward closure and the path towards healing.

Low-cost Initial Consultation: Tulsa Child Custody Attorney

Determining visitation can be overwhelming. Whether you have sole custody or visitation rights with your children, you should ensure your interests are protected during any Oklahoma parenting plan negotiations.

For a initial consultation with a Tulsa child custody attorney, call the Divorce of Tulsa Law Office today at 918-924-5526.

If you are getting a divorce in Tulsa, you may be wondering what are the typical child visitation guidelines Oklahoma.

In short, parents typically determine:

1) regular visits

2) holidays, and

3) summer break.

Regular Child Visitation Guidelines Oklahoma

Regular visits are the monthly, bi-monthly or weekly visits the noncustodial parent receives. This can be as often as the parents agree to, but is usually limited to every weekend or every other weekend.

Parents who wish to take their children to church may try to work out an arrangement where the child is returned by the time to go to church on Sundays or will simply take the child to church on alternate days or the week.

The noncustodial parent may also ask for visitation one or two days during the week during weeks they do not have a weekend visitation.

Where appropriate, a noncustodial parent may also exercise visitation in the form of transporting and attending a child’s extracurricular activities. This may include taking them to basketball practice and coaching the team, for example.

Holiday Child Visitation Guidelines Oklahoma

The Tulsa family court will likely ask that parents determine visitation during holidays. These include holiday weekends, like MLK Day or President’s Day.

Usually, parents alternate three-day weekends, but the noncustodial parent can ask for all three-day weekends, or most three-day weekends.

Courts typically award Father’s Day and Mother’s Day and parental birthdays to the respective parents.

As for major holidays, the mom and the dad may either alternate between Thanksgiving and Christmas (i.e. the mom has Thanksgiving if the dad had Christmas.)

Or, the parents may split these holidays every other year (The mom gets Christmas in 2015 and the dad gets Christmas 2016.)

Or, they may split the holidays themselves (The mom gets Thanksgiving until 5pm and the dad gets Thanksgiving after 5pm.)

Summer Child Visitation Guidelines Oklahoma

Summers can be a time when the noncustodial parent spends extended periods of time with their child. This may be two consecutive weeks or a whole summer.

A court will consider what is in the child’s best interest if parents cannot agree.

Low-cost Consultation: Tulsa Child Custody Attorney

Understanding child visitation guidelines Oklahoma is not easy. Allow an experienced Oklahoma child custody attorney to assist you during negotiations.

For a initial consultation with a Tulsa child custody attorney, call the Divorce of Tulsa Law Office today at 918-924-5526.

A Tulsa, Oklahoma child custody agreement usually does not anticipate many of the unexpected events that happen during the course of one’s life.

Often times, people get new jobs, fall in love, or must care for a sick relative far away from home.

If you, for any reason, want to move out of the state and you have primary custody of your children, you can do so.

However, there are a few legalities you should be aware of before moving more than 75 miles away from your primary residence.

Changing an Oklahoma Child Custody Agreement

You should always provide notice to your ex regarding any major changes in your life that will affect the children, even if it is not outlined in your Oklahoma child custody agreement.

Of course, deciding to move to another state is one of those changes.

Although informal notice is courteous, the law requires that your provide formal notice of your relocation, which must include the following:

1. the intended new address, including the specific address, if known;
2. the new mailing address, if not the same;
3. the home telephone number, if known;
4. the date of the intended move or proposed relocation;
5. a brief statement of the specific reasons for the proposed relocation of the child, if applicable; and
6. a proposal for a revised visitation schedule with the children

You must provide this notice within 60 days of your move.

If you move without providing timely notice, the court can order you to return the children.

Note, that it is also illegal to conceal your children from your spouse.

So, moving with no notice may subject you to criminal liability – regardless of the provisions of your Oklahoma child custody agreement.

Going to Court

If you provide timely notice of the move, your ex may object to it within 30 days of receiving notice.

The court will hold a hearing to determine:

1) if you are moving simply to interfere with your ex’s visitation rights and

2) if the move is in the best interest of the children.

This means that the court will consider the child’s community ties, schooling and support system at his current home. The court will also consider the impact the move will have on the child’s relationship with the non-custodial spouse.

Consider the following scenarios:

A) Mary is the primary custodial parent of twins Josh and Edward, who are in the fifth grade.

Although they currently live in New York, she has gotten a new job in Washington D.C. that pays twice the amount of her current position. She understandably wants to move to D.C. to take the job, and wants to take her children with her at the end of the school year.

Here, the court will likely find that Mary has a legitimate reason for moving the children. Josh and Edward will be transitioning to middle school in the fall, and they also have school-aged family members in the D.C. area.

The court will likely find that the children will not be harmed by the move.

Also, the court will consider the fact that it is a relatively cheap and easy trip from New York to D.C., which may not interfere with the dad’s visitation time.

The court may, however, order that Mary pay for the cost of travel or make other arrangements for the children to visit with their dad.

B) Same facts as above, except Mary wants to move to California for a job and take the kids with her.

Here, the court will likely look more critically upon the move because it will significantly interfere with dad’s visitation. If the court is willing to adjust dad’s visitation schedule to include, for example, whole summers and winter breaks, Mary be able to move with the children.

But, if dad objects on the grounds he cannot afford costly plane tickets between California and New York twice a year for the two boys, the court may order that Mary help pay the cost of travel. Alternately, the court may not allow the move at all.

C) Same facts as A, except Mary wants to move to Washington D.C. to do the exact same job she’s doing now with no significant benefit to her or the children.

Their dad objects on the grounds that Mary wants to move because she does not approve of his new girlfriend, who has been spending increasingly more time with Josh and Edward.

If the court believes dad’s version, it may not allow the move because it is just an attempt to interfere with the dad’s parenting time.

Additional Considerations

Unless modified by the court, your divorce decree or Oklahoma child custody agreement will remain in effect in any state you move to.

However, you should domesticate the order for it to be enforceable in your new state.

Low-cost Initial Consultation: Tulsa Child Custody Attorney

Life happens, even after the court has entered an order in your Oklahoma child custody matter.

For a initial consultation with a Tulsa child custody attorney, call the Divorce of Tulsa Law Office today at 918-924-5526.